Police officers - sense of humor

Police officers - sense of humor.
* "Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."

* "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

* "Can you run faster than 1,200 feet per second? In case you didn't know, that is the average speed of a 9mm bullet fired from my gun."

* "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

* "Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

* "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

* "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

* "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."

* "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"