David Bissonette :
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
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Sacha Guitry :
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin;
they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
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Socrates :
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy.
If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
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Anonymous :
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
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Dumas :
The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?"
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Sigmund Freud :
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
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Anonymous :
'Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.'
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Sam Kinison :
'There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking.
It's called marriage.'
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James Holt McGavra :
'I've had bad luck with both my wives.. The first one left me, and the second one didn't.'
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Patrick Murra :
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
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Nash :
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once....
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Anonymous :
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
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Henny Youngman :
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
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Rodney Dangerfield :
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
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Anonymous :
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'.
Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'
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Anonymous :
First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!'
Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
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